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In order to bring some equilibrium to a topic already discussed on the archetype of the womanizer, I decided to analyze his female equivalent and for the first time, I find myself at a loss and deeply confused by both: the archetype of the seductress and society’s attitude towards her.Then, there are those women who are “taught” or learn the art of seduction for a purpose, who pursue a goal through a certain target or targets. They aim with the precision of someone who knows every single man’s weak spot, and have him, enslave him, squeeze the benefits and move on not even scratched by remorse. In general, we have the seductress who makes the world fall at her feet with no trace of manipulation – Marilyn Monroe, Audrey Hepburn, Rita Hayworth, Sofia Loren, and many more, and also and quite naturally, the seductress number one in all human history – Cleopatra. On the other side, we have the typical gold digger, the home-wrecker, the one who women would rather call a bitch, but would blindly follow the 10 steps to becoming like her.
Again, we are going to take a walk down the history lane and explore the reasons why Cleopatra was that woman who will forever be known for having kings and emperors give her their kingdoms, surrender at her feet and beg for her attention. Cleopatra, although portrayed by the gorgeous Elizabeth Taylor, was not beautiful, not even pretty. In fact, she was rather plain, short, a bit chubby, and had that crooked longish nose she is still known for. So, if it wasn’t her beauty that enticed men, what was it?
Three things: she knew how attraction worked, she knew how to use her imperfections to her advantage and, in fact, never considered their imperfections, to begin with. Cleopatra was well aware of the single thing that mattered in any kind of relationship and that was VALUE. Realizing her own value, her own worth, and the completeness of the life she had with or without the attention of one admirer or other, she made men see that value and appreciate it. What she demonstrated was so much different than what any other woman would dare expose. She also moved with unmatched confidence in her own qualities and that was the reason she was free of any fear in the presence of men. She didn’t need their approval, she didn’t fight for it, she didn’t need to change her values and beliefs in order to be liked and loved. She never changed anything that could have harmed her well-being and the wholeness of per personality in order to keep a man. She was what she was and a man had to take her as she was. There was no other option. She was extremely well-educated, read a lot, all the time in fact. The way she made Julius Cesar fall in love with her is unparalleled – she rolled out of a carpet, presented to him a gift, and she charmed him with talk and jokes and was his mistress by the end of the evening. Seductresses are usually known for escaping family and children and keeping feelings at bay, but not this woman. When she met Mark Antony, they were so much in love that they preferred suicide to live separated by political interests. Cleopatra is synonymous with seduction as a trait of character, not as something artificial, fabricated, and manipulated.
The most striking features of a seductress, who will not go for a man’s power, money, or success only, are simple. Firstly, these women never chase men, they would never go out of their way to pursue a man. Instead, they would create the setting for him to feel welcome, if he wants to and if she wants him to. Secondly, they would never take rejection personally. They know that attraction is based on chemistry and if the chemistry does not work, well, nothing does. Instead of feeling depressed and boring the whole world to death with details on how he never called, how he used her for a night, how she is ready to do whatever it takes to win him back as most women do, a true seductress would take the blow silently and would understand that the lack of mutual attraction is nothing but a waste of time – his and hers. Thirdly, they would never compare themselves with other women. Comparison kills their self-esteem, shows weakness and insecurities. For them, hanging onto the approval of other people is what they wouldn’t allow – lack of personality and undermining self-worth.
For most men, these women seem unapproachable, but the truth is these men are afraid of being with someone so genuine, open about their needs and wants, of someone clever and charismatic. Well, this means just one thing – they are not worthy of her. She will find the worthy one and that will be the bravest of all who will withstand her power and reinforce it with his love.
And here we take a 180-degree turn and compare the archetype of these women with what is a cheap copy, a manipulated image not only in relationships nowаdays, but has been on offer for quite a while. The very fact that there are thousands of “gurus” teaching the art of seduction, that there are channels where you can literally learn how to “bag a millionaire” just because the hostess has been hanging out with one, the fact that so many women are trying to learn how to manipulate, what techniques to use to get what they want without having to work, how to make him book them a business-class ticket, take them to the high-end restaurants and places, buy them the most expensive gifts (on which they have dropped several hints), shows how low a woman can get in order to achieve a comfortable life (nothing wrong with that) while toying with a man’s emotions and trust – a lot of wrongs here.
These skills, believe it or not, are a whole science. It’s more than enough to have a look at Anna Bay’s YouTube channel “School of Affluence”, listen to her “precious advice”, watch her silicone face and body move about and wonder about the hundreds of thousands of women-followers she has. This teaching in expert lying and patience is a “full-time job” according to Anna.
The manipulative “self-taught” seductress is not stupid (in most cases she has a certain degree of intelligence, which she uses in a well-trained manner). She is also very beautiful and the looks will always come firsts because in some cases other qualities are missing. These women are no geishas. They are the wolves that will chase the desired prey – men, married or not, with children or not, that is completely irrelevant. What matters is getting to the man who will at any cost provide her financial comfort or push her career up like a comfortable push-up bra.
The reasons for the manipulation and the mind games, however, could be different. One motive could be: “I can’t have him and I don’t want anybody else to have him, so I’m going to destroy his life and ruin that ugly woman he chose instead of me.” A typical example here is Scarlet O’Hara from “Gone with the Wind”. Spoilt and used to having everything her way, she spends years of her life lying to herself that she loves Ashley, while in fact, she wants him only because he is madly in love with the kind-hearted and not so pretty Melanie. Blinded by jealousy, Scarlet entirely fails to see the love Rhett Butler has for her and realizes how much she loves him… naturally after he leaves her for good. “Frankly, my dear, I don’t give a damn,” – his final words in response to her pleading and confession of love. Too little, too late.
However, unlike many shallow-minded seductresses, Scarlet is exceptionally strong, independent and she learns to appreciate the good in people, feels remorse and genuine grief, and stays true to her nature – if she wants food and a new dress, she knows she has to work hard and rely on no one, but herself. These are lessons she learns the hard way, but that are not taught in today’s online courses on how to become a seductress in a few steps.
What women today learn is that you have to look pretty for him, throw a childish tantrum to get those earrings, don’t spend too much money on a present for him or you might spoil him and love has all to with a monthly payment as the aforementioned Anna Bay advises her audience – something like a cult of women who overlook the simple fact that a man is not an idiot, or if he is for the time being, sooner or later his eyes will open and when you bring nothing into the relationship except demands, he will walk away after having cheated on you with someone who would offer genuine affection and will allow him to spoil and please her of his own free will. Truth is, men love to please, that is in their nature, but not by force, not by nagging, and definitely, although they might be a bit slow sometimes to smell a manipulative woman, they will come to their senses.
Fortunately, for the well-trained seductress, there’s plenty of fish in the sea.
Unfortunately, men will still be afraid of the strength of a woman in full control of her seductive powers and that’s not a bad thing, because for those women the sorting process to find true love becomes way easier. She will be the woman you cannot have not because you didn’t want to, but because you never tried. You will sigh at the mention of her name, you will go into the shop, buy that perfume your girlfriend or your scheming wife has asked of you with the threat that you’ll sleep on the couch if you don’t give it to her, and you’ll live on miserably.
However, true love exists, people stay in relationships built on trust and openness and every single woman is the seductress she wants to be in the eyes of the man who loves her truly.
-By Geri Decheva
More in Diamonds Production Magazine MARCH 2021
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